First-to-Know

Do you have a first-to-know person?  You know, the one person, outside of your family, that you think about first when there is something going on?  You might even have a couple of first-to-knows.  When there is a crisis, a death, or a broken heart?  Or when there is good news like a good word from the doctor, a promotion, or the birth of a baby?  

I was thinking about my list of first-to-knows.  Who was on that list when I had my babies?  Who made the short list?  Who did I call when I received the news that my dad died?  Who supported me in prayer, brought a meal, and cared for my children?  Who held me when I couldn't stand?

The answer?

 

    Jonathyn, Elayna, Heather, Matthew, Emily and Dathyn (front)

This family, the Floyds, have been our heart friends for 15 years.  We met before any of us were married--and quickly became friends.  We were there for each other during the trying times of young marriage.  We were there when babies came. In fact, I missed being in the room when Emily was born by 15 minutes...and got to see Dathyn take his first breath.  If I hadn't had c-sections, Heather would have been there for the birth of my  last two babies as well.  Yes, we are THAT close. They were there for us through the death of both of Paul's parents and my dad.  They served us, prayed for us, loved on us, and did anything we needed no questions asked.   

Matt and Heather moved to Florida six years ago this July.  It was the first time I ever had to experience a parting scene as an adult.  Tears and sadness shrouded the whole summer that year, and grief shook me to the core; but as time traipsed on, our friendship took on a richness we never knew.  When we lived next door to each other we loved each other, but allowed little things to eat at us.  Now, when we get to be together every moment is cherished.  Little things don't bother us.  

It has been three years since we have been together.  THREE YEARS!!!  (How in the heck did that happen Heath?)  

Next week we will be spending time with our heart friends.  We are going on vacation--seeing many loved ones along the way--with our main destination being Hilton Head Island.  We are staying at the Disney Resort (part of the Disney Vacation Club, of which we are members) and have a three bedroom vacation home that sleeps TWELVE! We are over the moon with excitement to spend five days with the Floyd Family who will be driving up to meet us from sunny Florida!

And, just for the record, this couple is still on my first-to-know list.  :)

Summer Goals

I was challenged more this year than ever before in my life.  I learned so many valuable things, not just about the subject of my classes, but the most valuable lessons I learned were about myself.  

I learned...

• I am smarter than I thought I was.
• My husband is an amazingly supportive partner.
• Flash cards are my friend.
• My kids are very understanding.
• Life is busy and priorities matter.
• I can exist on very little sleep.
• I work well under pressure.
• I am motivated to succeed.
• Lists help me to stay focused.
• Having a plan is paramount.

I have been out of school since May 1st and it has been great.  I spent the month of May busy watching my kids in their different activities and working two days a week.  My last day of work was June 5th, which was also my kids last day of school.  We have been spending our time together!  Mostly swimming in our pool, taking walks, watching sports, playing, and shopping.  We have had so much quality time, it has been so wonderful.  

This summer there are a few things I'd like to accomplish.  I thought I'd share a few of them with you, because then maybe you can ask me every once in a while how that list of goals is coming.  So here it is.

• Teach myself how to play guitar so I can worship in my home.
• Memorize all 24 of my Bible verses for the year. 
• Organize my pictures and scrapbook them.
• Write something meaningful.
• Develop better eating habits.
• Develop a regular exercise routine.
• Become a runner.
• Sharpen my spiritual disciplines.

I would love to be able lead worship.  It is so deeply in my heart.  I also want to share my story with others--I have such a heart to pray for others and minister--I'm not sure how it will all pan out, but I know I am being prepared for something!  

I've loved the first six weeks of my summer break, and now I am ready to start hacking away at my list!

What are your goals for the summer???

Just a Thought

Today is a beautiful day in the midwest! I missed church because I wanted to get some work done in the yard; we are leaving for vacation in less than a week and I still feel like there's so much to do!  

While outside I saw the funniest thing.  My dog was just hanging around the yard when all of a sudden she started to go crazy.  She ran and leaped into one raised flower bed and sort of ran/jumped around in there back and forth like three times.  Zoe and I were astonished by the dogs enthusiasm, but we didn't quite understand what made her go berserk...until a little chipmunk high-tailed it out of the flower bed and zoomed across the front porch right under the bay window to safety.  Gigi followed the critter, but came up empty mouthed. 

I laughed at my silly dog and went back to my weeding and then a thought occurred to me.  That little chipmunk was lucky.  My dog is 100 times bigger than that little thing and she is also very fast.  The thing about Gigi is, she just likes to play.  She probably would have caught the thing, but killed it while playing with it.  The chipmunk ran for her life, and was successful in beating the dog.  

I wondered to myself, how many times have I been that chipmunk? How many times have I run and run and run and finally, with my survival instincts kicking in, dove out of sight for shelter?  My answer, too many times to count!  I am very good at running.  I am also pretty good at hiding when I feel threatened.

I am so glad that I have a God that pursues me.  A loving God that doesn't tire of my antics and will chase me out of pure love, because He knows what's best for me.  I am also so thankful that He doesn't let me hide too long.  He is patient and lovingly draws me to the shelter of His wings.  God's love is big and demonstrative.  How great is our God?

Focusing on What is Real-

Summer is my most favorite time of the year.  This summer is especially cherished, because the school year was so nuts.  I loved every minute of my first year in college, but I am so happy to have this time with my kids! 

Paul rarely has to travel for work, but this week was one of those weeks that he had to go away.  When my children were small, I did not look forward to him leaving for ANYTHING--now, it's not so bad!  Of course we would rather have him home, but this time it was easy.  Which brings me to the point of this post...

I am having a blast with my kids, they totally rock my world! 

I love being in contact with friends I've met all over the United States through facebook, twitter and blogging...but I'm taking time to focus on what is real.  I have "friends" that I've met in real life that used to just be commenters on my blog, and that was fun, but I have to keep it all in perspective.  My kids--my husband--my life here in the beautiful midwest--my relationship with God.  This is real life and I am so blessed.  My family is my heart and I intend on enjoying them to the fullest this season, which might mean that I turn off the computer from time to time.  :) 

 

Laura

I had the most wonderful weekend.  Picking up Laura from the airport was a great moment.  This girl has become my little sister in every sense of the word, and my arms and heart ache when she is away from me.  It's hard to describe our relationship--she is just part of me now, and I love her like my own flesh and blood.  ("Blud...blud...BLUD--NOT FUNNNNNYYYY" haha Laura!!)

Let me brag on my Laura girl for a minute. First off, Laura is a college graduate! (CONGRATULATIONS LAUR!  I'm so proud of you!)  Laura became a believer two years ago--she beat the odds.  Statistics paint the grim picture that it is virtually impossible for a college student to become a Christian.  It makes my heart smile knowing this information and seeing Laura not only walking with the Lord, but absolutely-sold-out-serving-Him is almost too much for this heart to handle.  I praise God every time I think about it. I cry tears of gratitude over it because this girl is singing the song of the redeemed--she is so in love with Jesus it is evident on her countenance and written in her smile.  I feel like a proud mama, and in small ways I am.  She is the bomb.com--it is a privilege to have her in my life.  I am honored and humbled that God placed her in my life, heart, and basement! ;)

I'm so thankful for sister-friends.  Laura, keep on doing the thing--you're doing it SO well! I love you deeply.

Little Did I know

Last August I got his little tattoo on my right foot; it was a thought and planned out event and the word "beautiful" was significant.

Isaiah 52:7

How beautiful on the mountains 
are the feet of those who bring good news, 
who proclaim peace, 
who bring good tidings, 
who proclaim salvation, 
who say to Zion, 
"Your God reigns!" 

At the time I got this tattoo, my heart was turned toward the Lord in a very tender way.  I was excited about the beginning of a new season in my life and I wanted to make a declaration; Where ever God wanted to take me on this path of life, I would share his message.  Hence the "beautiful" on my foot. 

Little did I know the places I would go this year.  Little did I know how much that word, permanently written on my foot, would mean to me.  Little did I know that it would take on a whole different meaning and how much I would cling to this new meaning.

It is very easy for me to see beauty in others, in fact, I love to point out all of the beauty I come in contact with.  Be it a silly conversation, a quirky adolescent trying to find her true self, a worship song that drives you to your knees, a friend in the middle years of life taking the time to learn new things, or the way the sun paints my trees a mix of gold and crimson every fall; beauty catches my eye, fills me with delight and sometimes even takes my breath away.  I am addicted to the way beauty makes me feel when I take the time to look and listen for it.

The down side of my personality is that I can be very critical.  Through the temperance of the Lord, I have stopped being critical of others, but I have had a very hard time not being critical of myself.  

I am an all or nothing kind of girl.  My motto is "Go big, or go home."  If I say yes to something, I am in it 100%.  I am a very relational girl.  I love people.  I love my friends deeply. In fact, I have been known to be quite passionate when it comes to the people in my life that God has so richly blessed me with.  I can't help it, it's who I am.

This year was incredible on one hand, but on the other it was also deeply disturbing.  My life changed when I became a full time college student last fall.  I loved every minute of my Freshmen year, did very well in my classes, and made the Deans List both semesters.  These things are all that 100% in-it-to-win-it side of me.  The side that is driven by a desire to be excellent at the things God has called me to.  

The disturbing thing about this year is that my health has spun out of control.  I'm not sure what is causing me to gain weight, because the only changes I have made to my diet/exercise routine have been for the better.  At the beginning of the summer I was the same size I have been for seven years.  Toward the end of June I noticed my shorts felt a little tighter than normal, but sometimes I gain a little weight in the summer, so I wasn't very worried about it.  By the end of the summer I was one size bigger, and now I am wearing a size double the original size.  I am a petite girl, measuring to a whopping 5ft 2 in.  At my normal weight, I am pretty much middle of the road.  I am not ultra thin, but I am usually satisfied with how I look.

This year, I am struggling.  I have had the hardest time trying to get out of this slump.  I would be lying if I said the weight didn't bother me.  It bothers me.  Even to the point of not wanting to go places where I know I will see people who I haven't seen in a while.  Bothers me so much that I don't want my picture taken and don't want to post any recent pictures on my on my blog or facebook. Bothers me to the point of being inhibited about intimacy with my husband.  In my head and heart I am relatively the same person I was a year ago, I am just wrapped in a layer of uncomfortableness.  

The tattoo reminds me that my purpose in life isn't to be beautiful.  Beauty is what happens when I am doing the will of the Father.  Beauty is loving people until my heart aches, serving until my body aches, and praying until my knees ache.  Beauty is so much more than my body, face and clothing.  Beauty is a gift.   The exterior beauty is only magnified by the inner work of the Spirit of God.  

 

Long Time no Update!

My heart wants to update my blog, but I get so distracted!!!  In true FACEDOWN form, I will give you another list! (Why I feel the need to warn you is beyond me! :) )

• It is the end of May and I am sad. For the last two years we have been honored to be the "host" family for college girls working an internship for Southwestern Company.  About mid winter we received a call from the company and I regretfully told them we weren't going to be able to host girls this summer.  It makes me SO sad to hang that up, but I know it is best for my family right now for it to be just us here.  This year my time and mind were so preoccupied with school that I really need to focus on spending as much time with my kids while they are out of school for summer!  The little twinge of sadness comes because having book girls live with us is not only fun, but it can be life changing.  I know that my first ministry is to my family, which is why I also know that the season for book girls is over for now, but I am sad about it.  
• Laura is coming to visit this weekend. For those of you who haven't been following my blog for long, Laura was one of our original book girls, and happened to live with us for two summers.  Laura is PRECIOUS!  Laura was not a believer when she came to us that first summer, and now she is an amazing woman of God.  I am so proud of Laura and filled with such emotion when I think of all that God did for her and all that she is doing for Him now!  I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that God works in crazy ways when we follow his leading.  It makes me excited to know the power of God, and that He is working in and through us.
• I miss writing! I am going to try to update daily as soon as school/work ends for the summer.  This blog is more than just words about my life...it is community.  I miss it.  
• I feel like I need to really DO something to break out of the "self" funk I am in.  I talked about going to NYSUM earlier in the month and I am going to start focusing on that in the next couple of weeks.  
• I want to make a difference in this world.  It drives me. It is the reason I've gone back to school, it is the reason I exist.  I know the pit I came from and how the course of my life was altered because someone made a difference in my life.  I want to be that someone.  I want to touch the untouchable, love the unloveable and reach the unreachable.  I have to, I am compelled by Love.
• Sometimes I wish I wasn't so intense! :) (Example? See above ;)!)
• My twenty-year class reunion is in July.  Holy smokes.  I'm not absolutely positively going.  I might wait it out and see who else is going.  (Lame, I know.)  But that stinkin' insecurity comes rushing back whenever I think about being there without friends.  Plus, how much fun would that be?  I'll answer it for you, NONE.  The tickets are $89.00 per person...I better have fun if I am spending that kind of cash!  Seriously, I am a little sad that the people planning it wanted to have it downtown Detroit in a hotel.  (Read:dressed up and uncomfortable.)  I SO wish it was going to be closer and casual.  (Both are also valid reasons to consider not attending.)  The extra weight I am carrying isn't helping me make this decision.  (I wish this wasn't the ugly truth about me, but it is.)
• Ending on a light note, summer is almost here and that is enough to make anyone smile!  I adore summer.  The late nights, the sleeping in, the icee wrappers all over my yard, the kids making noise, the friends dropping by to swim, the heat, the humidity, the romance, the music.  I love all things summer.  Summer starts in 11 days!  Yay for summer!